I hyperfocus on many things. It is something I am very used to, and I don’t really enjoy it, but I accept it as part of my life.
Hyperfocus is a recognised trait of autism, in some autistic children, particularly boys this can be on a specific subject or item. This could be trains, buses, or cars; football, and particularly FA Cup winners; or Pokémon. This trait is highly visible in some autistic girls, but in a lot of autistic girls, it is hidden.
I have, in reality, had hyperfocus. Every Christmas, I have a new creative project, making different handmade gifts. I have also had many hobbies which last for about a year or two before getting bored of them
- Gardening
- Sewing with my machine
- Candle Making
- Embroidery
- Kodaly musicianship
- Baking
Hyperfocus can often be at the detriment of everything happening around the autistic person; sometimes, it may appear that the autistic person has checked out of the real world because they don’t appear to be engaging with anything else. For many autistic people, their hyperfocus does overtake everything else, and that is no fault of their own; it is the way their brains are wired.
What I am more interested in is how autistic women and girls internalise their hyperfocus and how it affects their mental health. I have noticed I have done this throughout my life, and it is something that feels like it continuously plays in my mind. When I was much younger, I used to have huge crushes on boys, and it became the centre of my life, to the point that it was all-consuming. There was no way to park these things or reason myself out of it. It was just there, a lot. Back then I guess I thought it was normal, but now I realise that it was a hyperfocus event, caused my by autistic brain.
Hyperfocus can be linked to Obsessive Complusive Disorder, which makes a lot of sense for me, as I have also been diagnosed with OCD.
Research suggests that autistic people may be more likely to experience OCD, although anyone with any condition can have OCD.
https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/mental-health/ocd
From my experiences, both teaching autistic girls and being autistic myself, I have noted that hyperfocus in girls is often internalised, and the focus can be on thoughts and opinions about themselves or others. Sometimes these thoughts and opinions may appear positive, such as a crush on someone, and sometimes can be negative, such as poor self-opinions or negative opinions on others’ behaviour. Whatever it is, the focus gets in the way of the person’s day-to-day life, it affects their social interactions, creates stress and anxiety and can leave them disregarded.
OK, I’m going to be very real with you now. I have a hyper focus going on at the moment, to do with my own body image. I am a big girl, I have a number of health conditions which affect my eating, and I struggle to lose weight. I have the female lead in a local production; fortunately, the company I am working with is extremely supportive, and I have wonderful friends there. However, I cannot stop this fixation that, as a big girl, people will judge me, and I look out of place. I am trying to accept that this is part of my autism to be hyper-focused, and a lot of this is my perception, not others. It does, however, cause me great anxiety. What is positive is that now I know I am autistic, I can accept this is part of me, and this helps me ride the storm.
What do you think about autistic women and girls internalising their hyper focus? Do you internalise your hyper-focus? Do you think hyper focus presents differently in autistic women and girls? I would love to hear from you.
Leave a Reply